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fine, but not
May 07, 2004 5:41 p.m.

Perhaps a slight improvement in mood. This is riduculous and I don't know how to explain it.

For the past three or four days I have been fine. I don't know why or how, I just have been. I haven't been busier than usual really, and yet I haven't been thinking about him as much. Or maybe I have been, but I've tried to perfect the whole "go with the flow" attitude. Is it working? Maybe. Or maybe I've just been having a few good days in a row.

Today would have been 9 months together. I miss him a lot still, but it seems he will be back in August. Even just knowing there is a plan for August is helping me cope. A set return date is good, even if the true date is not yet set. This is the very first time I've heard of a return date. So I can do this, I can make it to August. Three more months.

I want to scream when I hear girls say, "I'm gonna miss my boyfriend sooooo much! He's gonna be away for two weeks". Yeah, well...fuck you. When he goes away for 6+ months, give me a call.

Still angry, it seems.

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