It just felt so long, for one. Have you ever had a day that just feels like it is never going to end, but at the same time you feel as if you haven't really been participating in it? If that makes any sense. It felt long, and yet sitting here now, I barely rememeber the entire day. Not because it went by so fast, but because I was in la-la land. I can hardly remember being at school, it was as if I was on a different dimension for 10 hours (yes, I spend 10 hours a day at school on Tuesdays).

I had two midterms today, both of which I felt prepared for. My first one I totally bombed, entirely not my fault. It was the hardest, most unfair, most ridiculous test I've ever taken in my life. It was bullshit, and I intend on telling the prof so, because it really, truly was. I studied everything we learned, and I know how to do everything we learned how to do with morphology and syntax, and I probably got about 13/52. I counted. I even gave myself a few bonus "oh gee, you really tried" marks, so really I deserve maybe 10/52. I could rant about this for an extremely long time, explaining why exactly it was horribly unjust but I've already spent an hour and a half of my day doing just that with the girl I sit next to in that class. Good to know that other people thought it was bullshit too. Let's just say, it was nothing like the exercises we were given in class, it was very, very extremely difficult, and totally inappropriate for a 100-level Intro course. Blah.

So I failed that, absolutely no question about it, considering I answered a 15 mark question with "I can't figure this out, I tried, I'm sorry". This was already my third class of the day, the first two went alright - I have my higher level Linguistics first thing in the morning, and I love that class because a) it's really interesting, b) my prof for that is extremely helpful, really clear, and a total sweetheart, c) a hot British guys sits behind me who looks just like Cory (guy from Hawaii I stayed with), who I fantasize about on a regular basis (Cory, not Brit boy). That went by just fine, then I had American Lit which I somewhat loathe. I can't figure out why exactly, but I think most of it has to do with the fact that I'm just sick of studying literature. It used to be my "thing" and it just...isn't anymore. So much reading, and truly, I feel stupid compared to most of the students in my class. My eagerness to interpret literature has waned so much that now I'm the one sitting in the back, staring blankly ahead pretending to be interested, while the girl in the front argues with the prof about Whitman's perception of death.

I've decided this will be my final year of literature courses. I'm already signed up for Canadian Lit, and I need to do it anyway, to get my big English prereq's out of the way. In case I ever feel the need to come back to English, I'll be done most of my major. Right now it's not looking likely that I'll ever want to come back, unless it's to do something modern - modern fiction I could handle. Short stories I could handle. 18th Century Lit? Sometimes in class I feel like I want to get up and run right through the big glass window, just to hear the smash it makes...just to see if I can fly...

I had Spanish last, which was my second midterm, and it went well. I finished quite quickly, even though I know I made a few mistakes, I didn't really know how to correct them and they weren't huge mistakes anyway. I'm happy with the way that one went, but I wasn't really happy during the class. A couple of the girls were being snotty to me during the first 1/2 hour, when we were still going over our homework and practicing - but one of them came up to me after I was walking out of the class, and was really friendly and asked how I thought I did, and continued to walk with me for a few minutes - I think that was her way of making peace. I think they're all scared of me, I gave them quite the "I'm gonna kill you, bitch" glare.

I sit beside probably the most mature guy in the class, which is sad considering he's only 18 and not even that mature. In general he's a nice guy though, really cute, and I was somewhat interested in him. I didn't think I was coming on strong at all...then today when we were partners in this conversation practice, I asked �Qu� tienes que hacer ma�ana? (What do you have to do tomorrow?) and he said, Tengo que llamar a mi novia (I have to call my girlfriend). Girlfriend, first mention of that I've ever heard. So I took the hint and while it's no big loss really it still kind of sucks. I have a feeling I scare him, too. Why am I scaring people, and I that beautiful...juuuuuust kidding.

Meh, PMS. I've wanted to kill far too many people today.

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