To give you a honest look at how drunk I actually am here is a clue:

I'm so drunnk I can bearely typei witoh shit it's so messed up but I'm sos hpapyy becasue i danc'eced witgh K and he asked me to go back to his poalce and to FUCK and I'm alike hakkkkkkkkhaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh so happy even though I didn't go and I'm so mad I didn't. Actually nmpt really mad beut kind of regeretting it now.

Okay. Seriously I'm going to start using the "backspace" now. If you couldn't understand that, my huge crush from high school K who I've talked about before and looked SO HOT TONIGHT...oh my gosh, seriously the hottest I've ever seen him look in my entire life. We danced for so long and were soooo hot together, and I thought I was going to die he was so sexy and such a good dancer and he told me to come back to his place. I wanted to sooooo bad but the stupid thing is -

I was in the shower this evening and I was thinking, Okay, do I need to shave it all off? Do I really need to shave today, hmmm I dunno, and I contemplated it and thought, well I know K is coming tonight but the chances of him actually getting with me are not THAT high, I don't know WHAT I was thinking, but I didn't shave anything "down there" if you know what I mean because of that. So after he invited me over to fuck I immediately though of my unshaved area and though, uuuugh oh my God. If I had been ready I'd have undressed him right there, but no. Plus I'm a good girl at heart and I'm scared of going home with a guy, even a guy I know....

I'm going to be soooo embarrassed tomorrow when I read this.

So I gave up getting laid by the one guy I make a GOAL of getting laid by, solely because I didn't shave my pussy.

DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE>

SENSE.

I'm such a dork. I have done nothing but lead this poor guy on for over a year now. Every time him and I get hot at clubs he always asks me if I wanna come over after and I always do my "maybe..." shit and I never actually go through with it. I have to let him know once and for all that I wanna fuck him and that should be it, I should just DO it already.

I should have gone home with him. Why didn't I again? Oh yeah the shaving, and also that I had a ride home and that was a nice thing to have. It was either, go home with K and fuck all night, come home the next morning with my parents having no clue where I was and everyone worried about me, or go home safely and be a good girl. It's really a toss up. The fact that this guy still wants to fuck me after a full year of cock teasing says a lot I think, but it won't last forever. I need to take my chances when I get them.

I'm stopping now before I sound like a serious slut. I'm not a slut, really. It's just one of my goals in life to sleep with this guy, and if you could see him...oh my. He's Spanish, not too tall, totally my kind of guy, and I've decided we're meant to at least sleep together, if nothing else. Okay. Enough. Buh bye.

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