Knowing obscure songs does come in handy at odd times like these. Country Joe McDonald, at Woodstock...original lyrics are "next stop is Vietnam"...or maybe everyone else knows that and I just look like an idiot now, which is probably the case.

I just think everything that has been happening in the world lately is ridiculous. I wish people could just...I don't know. I don't know what I'm trying to say, and I don't have the answers to anything. All I know is that if this is a war against terrorism and we're all looking for a little "peace on earth", using war as a way to achieve that seems pretty asinine. But what do I know, I'm just a Canuck.

Rebecca (http://bexodus.diaryland.com) wrote this poem today:

In the name of peace you aren't peaceful / In the "fight against terrorism" you inflict terror / Do not speak for me / I am not a country. I am an individual. It is because of this that I am silenced / I am Afghani, I am Canadian, I am American...it makes no difference. We are all the same / And you do this...in the name of peace?

Lovely, Bex.

This is what I think. If you want terrorism to stop, you don't go acting all tough and blowing up a few bombs here and there, like it's your way or no way. For God's sake, did we not learn this in kindergarten? If someone pushes you, do you have to push back? No, because if you do, they'll do it to you again. If you walk away, they'll stop. If you act like you've lost interest, so will your enemy. How much fun is it to insult someone if they really do not give a shit? If they don't bat an eyelash, you're the one who comes out looking like the fool.

If you ask me, I think bin Laden is the one looking pretty smart in all of this. Him and his colleagues pulled off probably the greatest scam of all time on the USA, the "best country in the world", and they cannot even get to him without using violence. He sent an entire nation into freak-out mode, and he knew it would work. Bush wouldn't back down at the chance of war, everyone in the damn world knows that. What a mastermind. Not that anyone should follow his example, I'm just saying. A little kindergarten thinking goes a long way here, folks.

I don't want anyone thinking I support terrorism or anything like that. It's just like, people...get a fucking clue already. You want to promote peace with war? Yeah, okay you go do that, see how far it gets you.

Thanksgiving dinner with the fam was painful. I'm in a weird mood tonight so that didn't help matters, I was being pretty bitchy. At least now that Mom blabbed to everyone and their dog about my depression, I guess they could have just assumed I was having a "down" day. Great.

Things just don't seem important now. I'm starting to lack meaning in my life. Nothing matters, you know? School is just school. Work, I really couldn't care less. I haven't written anything in a long time. When I actually do write in my real diary, it is only when I'm severely upset. No more stories, no more poetry. My creativity has been drained. I feel like everything in me has been drained and now I'm just this life form with nothing inside. No likes, no dislikes, nothing at all, just dull, gray nothingness.

I'm really bored with myself.

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