I talked to Cody Friday night, and the conversation lasted more than three minutes. It was not a good thing, however. He is leaving for training camp on the 26th, and does not want to see me or talk to me. So I will not see him before he leaves for school. I will not get to talk to him, I will not get to give him a hug goodbye. He'll just disappear out of my life for good. I asked him if I was allowed to call him during the year and he said, "I suppose". He says he thinks that it's better for us for things to be this way right now. So I will drop off his present on his doorstep sometime this week. Goodbye to Cody for a very long time, and I hardly get a real goodbye. I cried on the phone with him for a good 15 mintues, until I could finally say, "Well, I hope you have a great year". And he said, "I hope you do too".

So that night I went out with Michelle, Lindsey and Anna and we smoked six joints and had our usual ladies night. We listened to our "I hate boys" CD, which includes "our" smoking song - "I Got What You Need" by Eve, plus Michelle and I's favourite song of the moment, "Hit 'Em Up Style" by Blu Cantrell. The night after that I spent with my good-influence girl friends, Jess, Carmen, Breanne and Rhonda, and we went in the hot tub and talked for an hour and then watched The First Wives Club, which has always been a favourite of mine.

I'm young, and I love to be young, I'm free, and I love to be free...to live my life the way that I want, to say and do whatever I please...OH NO, you don't own me...

Right now, I feel alright. I'm okay. I'm sad, yet my world does not revolve around him. He is very important to me, but I am important to me, too. I've been writing in my gratitude journal, and I do have a lot to be grateful for.

Some of my friends have made me very, very upset in the last couple days, but I am dealing with it. I haven't seen them lately, and I don't intend to. I'm sick of people pretending to care about me and then going behind my back. I really don't understand some people, you know? How they can be so cold-hearted, so inconsiderate.

I'm on to my next Oprah book and that is Icy Sparks by Gwyn Hyman Rubio. I'm actually almost finished it, and so far I have enjoyed it. Surprisingly, Michelle had given it bad reviews but I'd picked it up anyway.

Michelle and I once made a Top 10 list. Our Top 10 most favourite books. It was so difficult it took us almost an hour of discussion, but we did it. I'm always on the look out for good books, so if you yourself have a personal Top 10 list...guestbook, please! :)

I have discovered the most amazing lipstick on the face of this earth, and it is CoverGirl Outlast. I put it on at 9 am yesterday. After three meals, a billion drinks and snacks (including a drippy and wet Oreo ice-cream sandwich), plus a shower, not a single thing had changed. It doesn't rub off on anything, not on glasses, food, people, not even one minute after application. You only need to apply once. Comes with a gloss you can re-apply if you want, just to keep your lips moisturized. It only comes off with make-up remover or baby oil. It's just a bloody amazing lipstick, and it gets 5/5 stars in Krista's make-up books.

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