Tomorrow is Cody's birthday. I was going to buy him a present, but he barely even wished me a Happy Birthday when it was mine, so I've gained enough self-respect to veto that idea. Then I was going to take him out to dinner, but he ditched me. Now, I think I will just write him a letter and make a card. Even that is too much considering he treats me like dirt. Cody never called me after he promised he would. He promised. He actually said, "I promise".
I wish I could take that as a sign and just totally forget about him like I could any other guy I was interested in, but I love him so much that I just can't. I truly believe that if you want something you can make it happen, and I just don't want to give up.
I could go on about this but I don't feel like crying right now.
Today wasn't all so bad. If I weren't so damn depressed all the time, I'd actually sound like (and be) a semi-pleasant girl. Preschool was great, as usual. I just love "my" kids - Jenna, David, Emma, Rebecca and Paige (Paige at the moment - first week it was Veronica, and then Taylor). They're all the cutest, most hilarious kids I've ever had the chance to know. I walk in today and Jenna runs to me yelling, "Krista's here!" and gives me a huge hug around my legs. Later on in the afternoon, she brings her wet painting to me and says "Look Krista I'm all done!" and presses it to my shorts, covering me in yellow, pink and green. And I still love her to bits.
I just found out that Cody got punched in the face twice and kicked by a girl on the bus ride home last night. I think that just made my day. As I just said to someone, she must have felt the vibes I was sending her and done the job for me.
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